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Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
09-07-2012, 07:42 PM
Post: #1
Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Prologue

ab yeh prologue kya hota hai..mujhe nahin pata..par harek great story ke aage aisa likha hota hai..is liye maine bhi likh diya.. kyonki main ek bahut sexy bahut great wagera wagera ...kahani likhne ja raha hoon.. ye kahani main hindustani main likh raha hoon.. angrezi main thora dheela hoon..isliye... hindi punjabi mix karke likh raha hoon... waise ye na sochna ke angrezi to aati nahi...phir ye mod kaise ban gya.. to bhai.. mod ban ne ke liye koun sa koi test pass karna hota hai... ye to bhala ho godfather saab ka ke mod ban ne ke liye koi test nahin rakha warna 90% mods... mod na ba pate...

haan to main keh raha tha... jis din se main mod bana main bade pasopesh main pada hua tha... main kabhie story section main aaya nahin... kabhie yahan kisi ko reps BW bhi nahin di.. to mujhe jaise bande ko mod ban ne ka kya hak tha.. mere zameer ne mere ko bada danta... (zameer jo antaratma karke hota hai ... wo :chutiya: zameer ahmed nahin jo hamari class main tha) to maine mod ban ne ke baad pehla kaam ye kiya ke story section main aaya.. waise bhi NHB se main bore ho chuka tha.. aur lungi ne waise bhi mera jeena haram kar rakha tha wahan.. yahan aake maine dekha ke chachu ne to yahan NHB aur UG se bh ziada gand daal rakha hai.. 2-3 din main yahan ghoomta raha.. 4-5 :chutiya: ban kiye... par main bada depress ho gya... maine socha ke ek break liya jaaye aur zindgi ke baare main seriuosly socha jaaye...

maine ek mahine ka break liya... aur khoob socha.. soch soch ke is nateeje pe pahooncha ke is se pehle ke log meri sexuality ke baare main sawal uthayein..(waise bhi UG main mere baare main badi ulti seedhi baatein hoti rehti hain).. mujhe proove karna hoga ke main bhi sexy sexy baatein kar sakta hoon...mujhe mere andar ke tharki kalakaar ko bahar laana hoga... aur mujhe ek kahani se shuruaat karni hogi..

to bhayio dil pe pathar rakh lo kyonki aapka apna, hardil azeez, rustam-e-hind, pride of exbii, jaan- e- bahar sh sh baba xyster ji maharaj 10008 pesh karne jaa rahe hain...love, sex, betrayal aur KLPD ki anokhi kahani


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09-07-2012, 07:42 PM
Post: #2
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Ek aur prologue

Budhwaar ka din tha.. pata nahin saala kaisa manhoos din tha.. koi baat seedhi nahin ho rahi thi.. pehle to meri police station main pitai hui… hua ye ke hamare pados main do Bengali families rehti hain.. wo apas main bahut ladte the.. par had is baat ki thi ke wo dono bangali main ladte the.. mujhe is baat pe gussa tha ke unki baat samjh nahin aati thi… us din subah subah phir se ladai ho rahi thi.. main bada tang aa chukka tha… main ek ke ghar gya aur us se kaha ke bhai agar ladna hai to hindi Punjabi main lad lo… kuchh hamara bhi bhala ho jaaye… Bengali to mujhe samjh nahin aati… pata nahin wo babu moshaiye kya samjha…(main Punjabi main bol raha tha).. usne police ko phone kar diya.. aur Punjab police to mere jaison ko dhoondti rehti hai.. wo mujhe pakad ke le gaye.. thane main kya hua.. ye to nahin bata sakta.. mod ki izzat ka sawal hai… par meri dhulai kaafi hui thi.. maine ye bhi poocha ke.. yaar bata to do kyon peet rahe ho.. wo kehne lage.. ke humain har baar thodi pata hota hai ke kyon peet rahe hain.. maine kaha bhai.. paise le lo.. par peeto mat.. unhone meri talashi li.. poore 35 rupiye nikle meri jeb se.. is pe unko aur gussa aa gya.. bas phir poocho mat kya hua.. par thori baad pata chala ke DSP ka kutta gum ho gya.. aur sab log udhar lag gaye.. mere ko chhor diya.. maine bahut duaien di us kutte ko..

Khair yahan se nikla.. seedha cyber café main ghus gya.. kai dino pehle mujhe ek mail aayi thi jisme maine $ 50 million jeete the.. kisi bhagwaan swroop bande ne mujhe mail karke mere internet banking ka login aur password poocha tha.. take wo $ 50 million mere account main jama karwa sake… maine bhej diya tha usko… achha banda tha Nigeria ka.. uska to koi jawab nahin aaya tha.. maine socha bank main hi check kar loon… shayad wahan jama karwa diye hon..main to ho gya… mera account balance jo kuchh din pehle poore 325 rupiye tha.. bilkul zero ho gya tha… mujhe bada shock laga.. maine bank wali madam ko phone kiya.. to wo boli ye to kisi Nigerian account main transfer ho gye hain… main samjh gya.. ke mujhse thagi hui hai..

Mera mood off ho gya.. aur jab bhi mera mood off hota hgai main jogging karne chala jaata hoon.. us din bhi chala gya apne college ke ground main… dhyaan mera kahin aur tha.. aur kar main jogging raha tha.. ek dum thokar khake gira… kuchh der to mere ko samjh nahin aaya.. ke ek dum se vertical se horizontal kaise ho gya.. par tabhi ek dum se mere lower abdominal region main badi pain shuru ho gayi.. mane dekha ke.. wahan se blood nikal raha hai… waise to main sher se bhi nahin darta… par blood dekh ke mujhe kuchh ho jaata hai.. main behosh ho gya… kuchh der baad meri aankh khooli to dekha ke main dr. gamdoor singh ke clinic main hoon.. mujhe wahan pe jo doosre bande khel rahe the.. kuchh mere dost bhi the un main.. wo utha ke laaye the.. dr. saab bahut knowledge wale bande the… readymade kapdon ki dukaan bhi chalate the aur har bimari ka tassali bucksh ilaaz bhi karte the.. bade bade news papers main unki chhoti chhoti ad bhi aati thi ke.. shadi se pehle ya shaadi ke baad job hi bimari ho wo theek kar dete hain… main khush ho gya.. ke chalo.. I m in good hands… par dr. Saab to bahut gambheer mudra banaye baithe the.. maine poocha dr. saab sab theek to hai?

Wo bole.. kaka tere to tatte phoot gaye…

Main ghabra gya.. maine kaha dr. saab aap hi maalik ho.. aap kuchh karo.. maine to abhi tak ladki ko touch karke bhi nahin dekha.. main to barbaad ho jaaoonga…

Wo bole.. dekh kaka injection to main laga deta hoon… par is injection ko lagne ke teen din ke andar andar agar teri lulli khadi nahin hui.. to saari umar khadi nahin hogi…

Maine injection lagwa liya.. aur ghar wapis aa gya

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09-07-2012, 07:43 PM
Post: #3
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Morning

raat ko main jaldi aake so gya tha.. dr saab ke injection main hi kuchh tha... shayd afeem ka injection de diya tha... par subah 9 baje meri aankh khul hi gayi.. jab mujhe achhi tarah se hosh aaya to pichhle din baatien yaad aayi.. mere toh hosh ud gaye.. maine socha ..bhai tere paas sirf 3 din hai lulli khadi karne ke liye.. warna tu to gya... par ab lulli khadi kaise ho...ye question tha.. maine socha dr saab ko phone kiya jaaye.... wohi koi idea de sakte hain... par jab maine phone kiya to udhar se kisi ladki ki awaaz aayi

"the service to the dialed number has temporarily been withdrawn because of non payment of dues"

maine socha dr saab kisi ladki se angrezi main baat kar rahe hain.. bade logon ki badi batein.. mujhe to kuchh palle nahin pada... kafi baar number dial kiya par shayad wo kafi der baatein kar rahe the..

haar kar maine khud ka dimaag lagana shuru kiya.. to idea aaya ke lulli to kisi sexy c ladki ko dekhke hi khadi ho sakti hai... ab sexy c ladki kahan se laaon... phir exbii ka khial aaya.. pnv main badi badi sexy kudian hain

par yahan bhi chain thora hai.. ye naye naye se jo mod bane hain ye saara din doosron ki jasoosi karte rehte hain... aur to kuchh kaam nahin inko.. phir ye eagle eyes wale thread main ek min lagate hain post karne main .. maine yahan pe sab ko keh rakha hai ke main shareef hun pnv main nahin jaata... agar inko pata chal gya ke main pnv main baitha hoon to inhone to mera jeena mushkil kar dena hai.. moderation ke liye gya tha ye bahana bhi nahin chalna.. kyonki moderate to main LLPAT ko bhi kar sakta hoon... aur namita ke boobs wale thread ko kyon moderate karta hai koi .. aur 90% pics to saber aur ulti ne fake banai hui hain .. inka kya faida

phir mere dimaag main ek aur idea aaya.. maine ladki patane ki sochi bas phir kya tha.. main nahaya.. kapde pehne.. baal wagera kanghi karki apna scooter uthaiya aur chal pada ladki patane..

mera scooter bajaj chetak hai.. 96 model.. aur start karne se pehle usko tedha kiya..30-40 kick maari aur bas nikal pada.. aaj to maine socha ya main nahin ya ladki nahin… aaj to patani hi thi… aakhir lulli jo khadi karni thi…

Jaise ek bhai keh raha tha ke Punjab main ladkiyon ka akal hai.. oye bau.. koi akal wakal nahin hai punjab main ladkiyon ka… tum kya jaano punjaban kya hoti hai.. khair gali ke mod par hi ek ladki rickshaw main jaa rahi.. lambe lambe baal.. aur laal colur ki t shirt… blue jeans… meri to lottery nikal gayi.. maine socha aaj to ghar se nikalte hi kaam ban gya.

Maine scooter rickshaw ke peechhe laga liya… scooter mera bada zabardast hai.. bas 3rd -4th gear main thodi problem hai.. dalte nahin hain.. 2nd main hi chalana padta hai.. aur agar full speed pe karo to rickshaw ke barabar speed ho jaati hai…

To phir rickshaw aage aage ..main uske peechhe..thori der rickshaw wala ruk gya aur rickshaw se utar gya.. wo peechhe ko aane laga.. pehle to maine socha ke mujhe peetne aa raha hai.. main jo uski sawari ko patane laga tha.. par uski chain utar gayi thi use chadane aaya tha.. maine socha ab sahi mouka hai ladki se baat karta hoon.. main dheere dheere scooter ko aage ki aur leke aaya.. aur thodi c hi peechhe ruk gya.. ladki phone pe kisi se baat kar rahi thi… wah kya gore gore haath the… mujhe halka sa current mehsoos hua lulli main.. tabhi usne phone band kar diya… aur apna haath neeche ki ore le aayi… main jaan bhooj ke doosri taraf dekhne lag gya.. taki usko shak na ho.. phir.. halke se garden ghuma ke ladki ki aur dekha… uska poora face to dikhayi nahin de raha tha.. par jitna bhi dikh raha thaw wo ekdum black colur ka tha.. maine hairaan reh gya.. ye kaise possible hai.. hath gore gore.. aur moohn ek dum kaala..

Kuchh din pehle hi maine aahat ka ek episode dekha tha.. wahan pe bhi ek aisi ladki thi.. par wo bhoot thi.. maine socha kahin ye bhi bhoot to nahin.. ek baar to mere ko dar laga.. par phir maine socha .. mujhe to lulli khadi karne se matlab hai.. bhoot ho ladki ho… kya farak padta ha

Phir mere ko ek aur khial aaya.. ab tak jitni bhi bhoot wali serials ya movies dekhi thi un main jo bhoot hote hain wo raat ko kabarstaon kea as paas dikhayi dete hain.. ye koun se naye style ka bhoot hai jo savere 10 baje rickshaw main ghoom raha hai… maine aur dhyaan se dekha.. to uski naak dikyai di.. naak to gori thi.. tab mere ko pata chala ke jise main kala rang samjh raha tha wo kala rang nahin us ladki ki darhi thi… main hairaan ho gya.. darhi wali ladki to maine kabhie dekhi nahin thi

Main kaafi confuse ho gya.. in halaat main mujhe ek hi bande ki yaad aati hai.. aur wo hai mera dost “teeta”

Is se pehle ke main story ko aage badhayoon.. main aapko teete ke bare main batana chahta hoon..taki aap achhi tarah se usko samjh sako aur kahani properly enjoy kar sako…

Teeta mera pakka dost hai… baaki sab theek hai par usko baat zara kam samjh main aati hai.. baat to actually mere ko bhi kam samjh main aati hai… (aap to apne ho is liye bata raha hoon .. par aap aage kisi se na kehna ) isliye hamari ziada banti hai.. wo apne dada ji bachittar singh ke saath yahan gurudware main rehta hai.. uske daade ko afeem khane ki aadat hai.. kabhi kabhie teeta bhi uski dibbi main se nikal kar kha leta hai … jab gurudware walon ko pata chalta hai ke ye log afeem khate hain.. to unko karke nikal dete hain… wo kisi aur gurudware main chale jaate hain… khana langar main hi khaate hain

Teeta +2 main 3 baar fail ho chuka hai.. uske baad ab wo mobile repair karne ka course kar raha hai… mera nokia 1100 usi ne 350 rupiye main second hand leke diya tha.. torch ke saath.. kehta raat ko bhi chalta hai..

Teeta bhola bhala masoom sa banda hai.. zindgi main kai gam hain usko .. uska sabse bada gam hai ke uske pind (gaon, village ) main bus nahin rukti.. ya 3 km pehle utar dete hain ya 3 km baad main… jawani main ek baar uska dada is baat pe protest karne chandigarh gya tha.. par police ne usko raaste main hi dhar liya tha aur khoob peeta.. itna ke abhi bhi usko kai baar sardiyon main dard hota hai..

Teete ka asli naam teerath singh hai.. par uske ghar walon ko itna complicated naam lena nahin aata .. isliye sab use teeta hi kehte hain… apna asli naam wo khud bhi bhool chuka hai.. +2 main 2 baar fail hone ka kaaran yahi tha.. teacher jab bhi attendance ke liye teerath singh ka naam bulate the to use pata nahin chalta tha ke uska naam bulaya hai.. wo absent mark ho jaata tha aur uske lecture poore nahin hote the aur usko roll number nahin milta tha.. jab teesre saal school waalon ko apni galti pata chali aur usko roll number diya.. to wo apni mehnat se fail hua tha…

Uska naam teeta kaise pada.. iski bhi ek kahani hai.. actually teeta distt bathinda ke pind kot fatta se belong karta hai.. unki saari family uske daade ke daade ke zamane se ek hi ghar main rehte hain… bahut saare log hain.. koi 150 bachche hamesha ghoomte rehte hain.. unhone bahut saare kutte bhi paal rakhe hain.. kutton ke naam bhi rakh rakhe hain.. ab itne saare bachche aur itne saare kutton ke naam rakhne main saare naam khatam ho jaate hain… kai baar koi naam kisi bachche ka bhi hota tha aur kutte ka bhi.. is liye jab kutte ko bulate the to bachcha bhaag ke aa jaata tha aur jab bachche ko bulate the, kutta aa jata tha.. is baat ka solution ghar ke bade budhon ne ye nikala ke jab tak koi kutta na mare.. tab tak kisi naye paida hue bachche ka naam na rakha jaaye.. aur jab koi kutta mare uska naam us bachche ko de diya jaaye…is tarah teerath singh ke janam ke 7 saal baad uska naam teeta rakha gya kyonki tab teeta naam ka kutta mara tha…

Khair apni story pe wapis aate hai.. teete ke bare main koi aur jaankari chahiye to mujhe pm kar dena..

Haan to main teete ko phone kiya…aur usne phone uthaya..
hamara wartalaap kuchh is tarah se hua..

teeta- hallo..koun bolta hai

main- oye teete main bol raha hoon..

teeta- yaar kamal hai.. idhar se bhi main hi bol raha hoon

usko 15 minute samjhane main lag gay eke main koun hoon.. wo to bhala ho us rickshaw wale ka ke wo bidi peene baith gya tha..

main- yaar teete, tone kabhi darhi wali larki dekhi hai?

Teeta- maine to nahin dekhi.. par shayad hoti hon.. maine saari ladkiyan thodi dekhi hain…

Main- kya matlab

Teeta – dekh, duniya main 6 billion log hain… in main se underage log jinki baat hum exbii ki story main nahin kar sakte… aur overage log jinki baat karne ka koi faida nahin hai… nikaal de to bhi kareeb 4 billion log bachte hain.. in main se 2 billion ke kareeb ladkiyan hogi… ziada se ziada 10000 ladkiyan maine real main dekhi hongi aur 100 000 ke kareeb photos, movies tv wagera main.. phir bhi baaki kaafi bach gayi.. ho sakta hai darhi wali ladkiyan in baaki bachi ladkiyon main hon..

Baat to teeta bhi theek keh raha tha.. main soch main pad gya.. itne main rickshaw wale ki beedi khatam hui aur wo dobara rickshaw chalane laga… main phir uske peechhe..

thori der baad market ke saahmne rickshaw ruk gya aur ladki utar gay.. ab main peechhe nahin hatne wala tha maine koi na koi faisla karne ka irada kar liya tha.. ladki utri aur seedhi meri taraf badhne lagi.. mujhe wo kuchh jaani pehchani c lagi.. jab aur paas aayi to mujhe wo mere dost pamme jaise lagi.. (pamme ka asli naam parminder singh hai.. wo exbii se kai baar ban ho chuka hai).. par maine socha pamma to 2-3 saal pehle zameen bech ke kisi foreign country main gya tha… shyad wahin jaake ladki ban gya ho… main hairaan ho gya.. maine kaha.. oye pamme tu ladki kab se bana...

Pamma meri baat sun ke gabhra gya.. jaldi se bhaag ke market ki toilet main chala gya.. main wahin khada raha.. koi aadhe ghante baad pamma wapis aaya.. bada khush.. kehta nahin yaar.. main ladka hi hoon.. main abhi properly check karke aaya hoon… tab bat meri samjh poori tarah se aa gayi.. paama jaroor aaj keshi nahya hoga aur baal khule chhor rakhe honge .. us baat se mere ko dhokha ho gya… Punjabi bhai to meri baat samjh gaye honge par doosron ke liye main samjha deta hoon.. kesh ,baal (hair) ko kehte hain aur sardar log daily sar pe paani nahin daalte.. hafte main ek do baar hi achhi tarah se nahate hain.. isko keshi nahana bolte hain..

Khair maine pamme se uska haal poochha aur kaha ke yaar tu to kisi foreign country main gya tha.. kya hua

Sun kar pamma rone laga aur kehne laga ke ..yaar mere saath to badi buri hui.. mere ko tere teete ne ek kabootar baaz ke paas phasa diya ..

(Punjab main “bahar” jaane ka bada riwaaz hai.. “bahar” kisi bhi foreign country ko keh dete hain… chahe bangladesh ho chahe USA.. ab kai log to padh likh ke bahr jaake settle ho gaye hain.. bade bade boards ke admin bhi ban gaye hain… kudiyan bhi phasa rakhi hain.. inki dekha dekhi pamme jaise bande bhi apni poonchh khadi kar lete hain (tyaar ho jaate hain) aur.. kisi na kisi agent ke chakkar main pad jaate hain.. agent inse paise leke inko “bahar” bhej dete hain… paise ye log aksar apni khet bari wali zameen (agricultural land) bech arrange karte hain… is “bahar” bhejne wale process ko kabootar baazi aur agent ko kabootar baaz kehte hain.. kabootar (pigeon) aap khud hi samjh lo koun hua)..

Pamme ne aage kaha … yaar wo kabootar baaz ne promise kiya tha ke mere ko Mauritius bhejega.. paise bhi le liye par Mumbai main se ship pe chada ke ..ek lamba sa chakkar lagwa ke.. kerala main utar diya.. 6 mahine mahine to mujhe pata hi chala ke main Mauritius main hoon ya kerala main.. jab pata chala to yahan wapis aane ke paise nahin the.. kahan to socha tha Mauritius main casi chache ki kahaniyan sunenge .. incest wali.. kahan kerla main saara din alamzada saab apne law lecture de de ke bund maar lete the.. aur raat ko illegal aake apna sumo wala danda usi bund main ghusa deta tha.. bade dukh waale din kaate hain maine veer… wo to kabhie kabhie shapusundri ka mujra dekhne ko mil jaata tha.. warna main to wahin mar jaata.. jaise hi paise ikkathe hue main wapis aagya..

Mujhe teete pe bhi bada gussa aaya.. man hi man usko khoob gaaliyan de daali.. wo gaaliyan yahan nahin likh sakta.. against the rules hai.. main khud hi apne aap ko ban kar doonga.. kal hi ek :chutiya: 3 baar ban kiya tha.. gaaliyon ke chakkar main..


Illegal to mera boss tha… election ke dino se.. uska to main kuchh kar nahin sakta tha.. haan par alam sir ko dekhne ki maine thaan li.. mere hi section main the… par in sab ke beech shapu ke liye mere dil main izzat aur bhi badh gayi..

Pamme se vida leke ..apni kismet pe rota hua.. maine wapis scooter start kiya aur ghar ki aur chal pada.. raaste main phir ek cyber cafe aaya.. to maine socha… yaar exbii pe hi chalke lulli khadi karne ka intzaam kiya jaaye..warna aaj darhi wali ladki dikhi thi..kal ko seeng wali dikh jayegi.. apna time aise hi nikal jayega.. good old exbii hi theek hai.. aur baaki rahi jo mere pe jasoosi karte hain unki baat.. unke pnv threads ki main waat laga doonga.. apne plan pe main man hi man muskurata hua cyber café ki taraf chal pada…

aaj maine pakka man bana rakha tha ke… kisi aur cheez pe dhyaan nahin dena aur seedha pnv main ghus jaana hai.. par adat se majboor mere browser ne pehle hi NHB main ja dhakela… wahan pe jaake dekha ke saare naye mods full spammimg kar rahe the.. ek doosre ki smilies copy karke bade khush ho rahe the.. ulti ke 15-20 alias bhi ghoom rahe the.. moody talli hoke apna rona ro raha tha.. rohan bhaji aur chachu ki apni ladai side by side chal rahi thi.. chachu harek bande ko 4-4 page ke pm bhej raha tha.. hamesha bhai aur ali bhai as ususal ek doosre ko kos rahe the… rj bhi tha.. chakk sir uske peechhe peechhe wo unke aage aage.. mms bhaji aur rajveer apna alag tandoor laga ke baithe the.. alphu sir, buddy aur sid ki love story bhi chal rahi thi.. bakri bhabhi bhi kuware ko dhoondti ghoom rahi thi.. in sab ke beech main lungi bhi apna ek thread khol deta tha.. in short poora mela laga hua tha.. mera bahut man hua in logon ke beech jaane ka.. par maine man ko samjhaya ke kaka lulli khadi karle… end main usi ne kaam aana hai.. ye mausmi yaar to 2 din na aayo.. bhool jaate hain…

man ko kada kar ke.. main pnv main ghus gaya.. seedhe adult section main.... aaj glamour ka koi kaam nahin tha aur dekho.. kehte hai na.. bhagwaan unki madad karta hai jo apni madad khud karte hain.. ghuste hi koi message aagya.. mere screen ke bottom right side ke corner se.. kisi kudi ka tha.. kapde thore kam pehne hue the par ladki badi sunder thi.. English main koi message bheja tha.. pehle to socha usne mere ko gaali di hai.. mujhe gussa aa gya.. gusse main use ban karne laga tha.. par maine socha ke pehle pata to karloon ye keh kya rahi hai.. ab aap ko to pata hi hai ke english mere ko kam aati hai.. maine apne ek saathi mod budmaash ko pm kiya aur jo us ladki ne message bheja tha “ I am ready and waiting for you in kurali” is ka hindi main matlab poochha.. budmnaash pada likha banda hai… bade bade logon ko jaanta hai.. uska jawab aaya .. ke “koi tyaar hai aur kurali main tera intzaar ho raha hai” ab aapko to pata hi hai main chandigarh ka rehne wala hoon aur kurali yahan se 15-20 km door ek chhota sa shahar hai.. main samjh gya ke ladki mod hone ki wajah se mere se dosti karma chahti hai.. aur baaki pnv mods main se koi bhi chandigarh ke aas paas ka nahin hai.. apni kismet pe mujhe yakeen nahin hua. Par socha.. sab bhagwaan ke marzi..uski marzi kea age kisi ki nahin chalti..

ab kurali yahan se 15-20 km door tha.. apne scooter pe jaata to kal hi pahunchta.. waise bhi maine socha bechari dhoop main khadi hogi.. gora rang uska kaala na ho jaaye.. waise bhi kisi ko itna stana insaniyat ki baat nahin hoti.. maine socha kyon na taxi karke jaoon.. jis se aap pyaar karte hain… us ke liye itna to kar hi sakte hain… haanji.. us ladki se mujhe pyaar ho gya tha

café ke paas hi taxi stand tha.. maine scooter wahin khada kiya aur taxi wale ke paas gya.. maine use bataya ke kurali aana jaana karma hai.. shyad wahan thora ghoomna bhi pade.. kitne paise lega.. wo kehta ..sab mila ke 1500 rupeiye lagenge… maine kaha maine teri taxi ka rate nahin poochha kurali aane jaane ka kiraya poochha hai… wo hasne laga.. aur bola… ye kiraya hi hai… pata nahin ye kya chakkar hai… main jab bhi koi seriously baat karta ..log hasne lag jaate hain… khair.. maine maine hisaab lagaya ke mere paas to 350 rupiye the.. itne main kya banta hai…

aise time pe hi mujhe teete ka khial aata hai.. maine usko phone kiya aur hamesha ki tarah 15 minute baad use pata chala ke main koun bol raha hoon.. maine dheere dheere saari baat use samjhayi to wo bola ke main uske paas aa jaoon to mil ke koi hal nikalte hain.. maine pata kiya ke aaj kal wo log koun se gurudware main reh rahe hain aur us se milne chal pada..

wo gurudware ke bahar hi khada hua tha.. mere ko dekh ke bola ke us ne hal nikal liya hai… maine poochha kya hal hai… aur scooter pe jaane ki baat mat bolna ye idea main pehle hi cancel kar chuka hoon…

wo bola ..dekh aaj kal is gurudware main construction ka kaam chal taha hai.. kai saare tractor trolly kaam pe lage hue hain… abhi baje hain 12.. bhaiyye jo tractor chalate hain 12 se 4 baje tak koi kaam nahin karte.. inka tractor le jaate hain.. 1-2 mere dost hain yahan.. de bhi denge... 4 baje tak hum wapis bhi aa jaenge.. bas 100 rupiye ka diesel lagega

maine kaha yaar.. idea to sahi hai.. deisel to 100 ka chhor 120 ka dalwa doonga… par tractor pe ladki ko date pe le jaana .. achha lagega kya..

teeta gusse se bola… yahi to teri problem hai.. tu baat poori tarah se sunta nahin.. pehle hi beech main bolne lag jaata hai.. maine kab kaha ke tractor pe jaenge.. bhai uske saath trolly bhi leke jaenge.. aisa karenge trolly main dari (Punjabi mattress) bichha lenge.. uske upar ek kusi rakh lenge.. tu kursi pe baithna.. babuji ban ke.. aur main tera driver..

teete ka idea sun ke main khush ho gya.. ye to convertible ban gayi.. ..ab to ladki pakka fasegi… phir maine poochha ke dari kursi ye samaan kahan se laayenge.. teeta sochne laga.. maine socha ..teete ne ek din ke liye bahut soch liya.. ab meri baari hai.. maine poochha.. ke gurudware walon ne tumhe neeche bichhane ko dari to di hogi..

teeta bola… haan.. do di hain.. ek mere liye aur ek mere babe (dada ji) ke liye.. par kal raat ko maine phir bed main susu kar diya tha aur isliye maine usko dho dala.. wo abhi bhi geeli hai… doosri pe mera baba abhi soya hua hai..

maine kaha … koi problem nahin.. tera baba nashe main hi hoga… usko utha ke bina dari wale bed pe lita dete hain.. nashe main use kya pata chalega wo kahan leta hua hai..

teeta ye baat sun ke khush ho gya.. hum uske room main pahuche.. maine uske babe ko bistar se uthaya… wo poori pinak (nashe) main tha… dossre bed pe daalne ke baad maine waise hi pooch liya..

kaise ho baba ji… sab theek hai na..

wo bole.. sab theek.. bas tu gaadi chalata reh.. jab mera station aa jaye.. seeti maar dena.. main utar jaoonga…

main samjh gya baba ji nashe main ..train ki yatra kar rahe hain.. maine unko bed pe rakha aur teete ne dari nikal li.. hum ne wo dari wahan khadi ek trolly main bichha di… gurudware wale bhai ji se ek kursi mang li.. tabhi teeta bola ke yaar kursi ek nahi do honi chahiye..

maine poochha… teete tera dimaag to theek hai.. main do kursion pe kaise baithoonga..

usne meri taraf ajeeb nazron se dekha.. kehta.. doosri kursi tere liye nahin bharjai (bhabhi) ke liye.. use saath hi le aayenge…

mere dil bhar gya.. kewal ek sachcha dost hi itni detail main soch sakta hai.. teeta ek sachcha dost tha.. maine uske rayban ke sunglasses bhi maang liye… jo usne sector 22 ki rehri market se 75 rupiye main kharide the

to phir hum dono … teeta aage tractor ki driver seat pe aur main peeche trolly main kursi pe ..rayban ke glasses pehan ke.. kurali ki taraf nikal liye…

Quote this message in a reply
09-07-2012, 07:43 PM
Post: #4
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Afternoon


Mohali se humne 100 rupiye ka diesel dalwa liya kyonki wahan sasta tha.. main to poore 120 ka dalwana chahta tha par teete ne phir samjhdaari dikhayi aur kaha ke raste ke liye kuchh to paise hone chahiye… bharjai ke liye koi gift wagera lena pad sakta hai… hamari bahas sun ke wo attendant hamari taraf badi ajeeb nazron se dekh raha tha…phir hum chal pade kurali ki aur.. mausam suhana tha sadak ki ek side main buildings ban rahi thi.. dossri side main bhi yahi ho raha tha..

mohali se thori door niklane ke baad teete ne mujh se poochha “ yaar wo jo attendant tha meri taraf aise kyon dekh raha tha…”

ek PnV mod hone ki wajah se mujhe latest sexual trends ki jaankari hamesha rehti hai… maine kaha – “yaar aaj kal bade bade shahron ki dekha dekhi chhote chhote Shahron main bhi gay ban ne ka riwaaz chal pada hai… shayad wo gay ho aur tu use pasand aa gaya ho…”

ye sun ke teete ke chehre pe lali aa gayi… teete ka actual rang kafi kaala hai… aur ab laal rang aane se.. uske chehre ka rang purple sa ban gaya… wo rang mujhe bada pyara laga aur main bhi gaur se uski taraf dekhne laga... mujhe apni taraf is tarah se dekh ke wo ghabra gaya.. aur kehne laga –“ bhai tere liye ladki dekhne jaa rahe hain ab koi naya drama shuru mat kar dena”

teete ki baat to mujhe samjh nahin aayi par main uski taraf dekhna band kar ke apne hone wale jeewan saathi ke khialon main kho gaya… thodi door jaane ke baad humne dekha ke Punjab police ka naaka laga hua hai aur ek constable 303 ki rifle leke khada hai… paas hi ek ASI kursi pe baitha kar raha tha… humain dekhte hi constable ne haath deke rok liya… teeta ek dum se jump maarke utra aur dono ke saamne haath jod ke khada ho gaya…

ASI ne poochha- kyon bhai.. koun ho, kahan se aaye ho aur kahan ko jaana hai
teeta bola- janab mera naam teeta hai hum chandigarh se aaye hain aur kurali jaana hai
ASI ne phir poochha- aur wo jo peeche aise baitha hai jaise baandar tibbe pe baitha ho.. wo koun hai (baandar ka tibbe pe baitha hona Punjabi ka ek mash hoor expression hai... ise kahin bhi fit kar dete hain khaas taur se koi smart sa banda kisi achhi si chair pe baitha ho.. literally it means a monkey sitting on a dune)
Teete ne kaha ji wo xyster hai hum isi ke rishte ke liye kurali tak jaa rahe hain..

Ab usne traali ke kagaz patar (documents) maange… wo to hamare paas the nahin… wo kehne laga ke ab to challan katna padega… itne main main bhi neeche utar aaya aur kaha.. aise hai sir ji ke jab kisi paas license na ho to aap uski RC rakh lete ho…aur agar RC na ho to license… hamare paas to dono nahin hai.. ab kya karoge…

Wo kehne laga tab hum tumhari gaadi band kar lenge aur tum paidal ghar jaana… ye sunke teeta unke pairon main gir pada aur kehne laga – aisa zulm mat karma sir ji.. mera dost to barbaad ho jaega..

To wo bola ke aise karo challan katwa lo aur apne upar wale kapde yahan chhod jaao… jab challan bhar doge to kapde le jaana- simple… hum ne majboori main apne shirts aur pants utar di.. teeta to neeche se baniyan aur naale wala kachha jo uske knees tak aata tha..wo pehne hue tha.. par maine sirf apna VIP frenchie daala hua tha… mujhe thodi thodi sharam to aa rahi thi.. par kya karta..

Khair us ASI ne constable se kaha ke challan kaat.. ab constable ne poochha ke sir ji kis cheez ka challan katoon… ab ASI sochne lag gaya… wo kehne laga… ye dekh ke challan book main pichhla challan kiska kata hua hai… wohi inka kaat de…

Constable ne kaha ke kal raat inspector saab ne ek lexus gaadi ka challan kata tha.. koi bau jallandhar se Chandigarh apni sasuraal ja raha tha.. usko dhar liya tha.. wo ziada akadne laga to high beam ka challan kaat diya.. meri duty bhi yahin thi kal raat..

ASI ne wohi challan hamara kaatne ka keh diya..

To is tarh hum dono bhai apne kapde utarwa ke aur dopahr 2 baje high beam ka challan katwa ke apni manzil ki taraf chal pade...

Kurali se pehle ek aur chhota sa shahar padta hai..kharad… apni exbii ki member timmi ji yahin se hain.. wahan jaake pehle maine socha ke hi shai bolta chaloon.. par phir apni aur teete ki halat dekh kar wo idea drop kar diya.. par jaise hi hum ne kharad wala turn liya to dekha ke timmi ji wahan jogging kar rahi thi... main bada hairaan hua... par wo jogging seedhe seedhe nahin kar rahi thi.. 10 -15 meter aage ko bhaagti thi aur phir wapis aa jaati thi.. phir aage ko bhagti thi aur phir wapis... sabse hairani wali baat ye ke jis road pe wo bhaag rahi thi wo ban rahi thi... uske dono taraf tar ke drum garm ho rahe the aur aaps paas kai bande khade the.... ek banda kursi pe baitha moongphali kha raha tha... jaise hi timmi ji ne mere ko dekha to haath deke tractor rukwa liya... teeta ne tractor roka aur main utar gaya... timmi ji mere paas aayin aur bade pyaar se meri taraf dekhne lagin.. maine sirf apna VIP frenchie pehna hua tha... unko dekhte hue teete ne bhi dekh liya... itne main jo banda moongphali kha raha tha wo hamare paas aaya... aur timmi ji ko bola ke wapis kaam pe lago.. in nango ke beech main aap kya kar rahe ho

Timmi ji to chali gayi aur wapis jogging karne lagi... maine us bande se poochha ke bhai ye kya chakkar hai…tumhara koun sa kaam hai .. aur timmi ji kyon kar rahi hain.. to wo banda kehne laga ke main PWD ka JE hoon.. ye sadak banwa raha hoon.. aaj hamara road roller kharab ho gya aur sham tak ye sadak complete karni hai.. is liye timmi ji ko laga rakha hai yahan.. aur ye kaam wo free main nahin kar rahi.. paise leti hain... bas 10 minute ka kaam reh gaya phir inko jahan marzi le jaana.. hamari bhi jaan chhotegi... itna keh ke wo banda chala gaya..

Uske jaane ke baad teeta mere paas aankhein matkata hua aaya.. aur poochhne laga ..ye koun thi
Maine kaha.. exbii ki member hai.. abhi abhi MC bani hai… election ka koi chakkar tha..

Teete ne kuchh der socha aur kehne laga.. dekh mere ko ek idea aaya hai.. chhod kurali wali ka chakkar.. timmi ko hi pata le...
Maine kaha- oye teete tera to dimaag kharab ho gaya hai.. ye mere se kam se kam 35 saal badi hai... inki meri jodi kaise jamegi..
To teete ne mujhe samjhate hue kaha.. dekh umar sab kuchh nahin hoti… social status bhi hona chaiye…ab tu koi chhoti moti cheez nahin hai… mod hai.. wo bhi pnv aur stories ka… tere liye ladki kam se kam MC to honi chahiye...
Baat mere ko bhi jam gayi... maine socha theek hai... aiwain hi kisi ban hui ladki ke chakkar main pad gaya modship to jaegi.. badnami alaag se... aur sabse badi baat exbii ki exbii main reh jayegi... itne main timmi ji wapis aa gayi.. aur mere ko upar se neeche bade khatarnaak dhang se dekhne lagi ...phir unhone poochha ke ..yahan kya kar rahe ho...

Main kuchh bolta..us se pehle teeta bol pada.. ”kuchh nahin ji.. aise hi ghoomne aaye the ab wapis ja rahein hain..
Timmi ji ne kaha theek hai.. mere ko bhi Chandigarh drop kar dena.. kuchh kaam hai... main paani peeke abhi aayi...

Unke jaane ke baad teeta ek dum se bahut khush ho gaya... maine poochha- kya baat hai.. itna khush kyon ho raha hai.. to wo kehne laga ke do baatein hain.. ek to kaam ban gaya.. doosri jo thoda diesel bachega wo main apne daade ko de doonga.. wo kabhie kabhie diesel bhi peeta hai .. nashe ke liye.. par mujhe ye bata ke timmi bharjai kursi pe to aayegi nahin… inko kahan rakhenge…

Teete ki baat bhi sahi thi… par iska hal timmi ji ne khud hi nikal liya.. wohin alathi palthi maar ke trali ke floor pe bith gai aur mere ko kaha ke unki god main sar rakh kar let jaoon.. main let gya…

Wo pyaar se mere baalon main haath phirate hue kehne lagi.. aaj to bade handsome lag rahe ho… exbii pe jab bhi dekha.. suit boot tie laga ke ghoomte rehte ho… maine to pehli baar tumhara chikna badan dekha hai….

Maine kaha ke wo to ji hum mods ka dress code hai.. wahan ye sab karma padta hai.. aaj chhutti thi to aaj thoda normal dress main ghoom raha hoon... waise bhi jatt kachhe main hi sohna lagta hai…

Timmi ji ki god main let kar mujhe apne bachpan ki baat yaad aa gayi... jab main chhota hota tha to ek baar chhat bir zoo (a zoo near chandigarh) dekhne gaya tha... wahan pe kai jaanwaron ke saath maine ek hippopotamus bhi dekha tha... mujhe wo bahut pyara laga tha... meri iccha thi ke main uski ride loon... par zoo main ye sab allowed nahin tha... ab timmi ji ki wajah se meri wo ichha poori hone wali thi... maine socha... ride jab hogi tab hogi... abhi god main let kar maza le lo..

Aise hi khialon khialon main gaane gaata hua.. timmi ji ke god main leta hua tha… tabhi tractor ruk gaya… main uth kar baitha to dekha ke wahi naka aa gaya… jahan hamare kapde utare gaye the… wohi constable humain rukne ka ishara kar raha tha… hum utre, uske paas gaye aur poochha ab kya galti ho gayi maalko

To usne kaha.. lagta hai tumhare kachhe bhi utarne padenge… ye aate ka drum kahan se leke aaye ho.. chungi (octroi) bhari hai iski ??

Maine kaha… ji ye koi cheez nahin hai ke inki chungi bhari jaaye.. apni timmi ji hain..

To wo bola… achha ye timmi kya hota hai… to maine kaha ke ye exbii ki nayi MC hai..

Tabhi uska ASI neeche se bola… nachhattar singh utaar oye usko neeche.. hum lete hain iski introduction...

Consteble nachhattar singh ne timmi ji ko neeche utara.. maine kaha.. sir ji ho to gayi introduction aur kya reh gaya batao.. wo bhi bata deta hoon..

ASI bola..kaka Punjab police ka introduction lene ka apna ek alag tareeka hota hai… abhi tu bachcha hai... pata chal jaega... itna keh kar wo aur uska consteble timmi ji ko kheton main le gaye.. hum wahin baithe rahe… tabhi humne dekha ke hamare kapde wahin pade hue the… maine teete ko kaha ke kapde pahan aur bhaag le… timmi ji ke size ke hisab se.. inki introduction 2 hafton main poori hogi

Humne kapde pehne aur dekha ke wapis kurli jaake aane ka diesel to tha nahin.. yaan Chandigarh ja sakte the ya kurali… so humne wapis Chandigarh jaane ki sochi… aur tractor start karke chal diye.

Bhare hue man se hum wapis Chandigarh ki taraf nikal liye… koi kuchh nahin bol raha tha.. bas chup chaap timmi ji afsos mana rahe the… Chandigarh ke paas jaise hi humne turn liya to dekha ke kai bande milke ek bande ko peet rahe the.. humne bhi socha do haath hum bhi dhar dete hain… lalkare maarte hue …bole so nihaal bol ke… humne bhi humla kar diya… abhi 2 -3 haath hi mare the.. ke banda mujhe jaana pehchana sa laga… maine gaur se dekha to mujhe wo casinaar chachu jaisa dikha.. chachu ne bhi mujhe pehchaaan liya... unhone kaha... xyster puttar mere ko bacha... subah se yaha pe pit raha hoon.. jo aata hai peet ke chala jaata hai.. koi baat bhi nahin sunta..

Mujhe bada gussa aaya.. chachu jaisa marzi hai.. exbii ka member hai.. ex EC hai.. hamare siva unki koi nahin baja sakta.. maine sab ko rukne ke liye kaha aur poochha ke bhai kyon maar rahe ho... to sab idhar udhar dekhne lage.. un mein se ek bola... humein kya pata kyon peet rahein hai... jab hum yahan aaye.. to ye pehle se pit raha tha... hum ne to dekha dekhi peetna shuru kar diya...

Chachu ne kaha puttar ye sahi baat bol raha hai.. ye to doosre log hain... jisne meri dhulai shuru ki thi wo to cycle pe doodh ke drum leke ja raha tha.. main to sadak pe ja raha tha pata nahin kis baat pe usne mujhe peetna shuru kar diya..

Maine sab logon ko wahan se bhagaya aur chachu ko poochha ke chachu aisi to koi baat nahin... bina baat to koi yahan kisi ki dhulai nahin karta... ye baat alag hai ke koi pit raha ho to sab usko bina karan jaane peetne pahuch jaate hain... kuchh to aapne zaroor kiya hoga..

Chachu- kasam se puttar .. mujhe apne CEC shri v_bottesh ki kasam maine kuchh nahin kiya

Main- chachu aisa nahin ho sakta.. koi na koi harkat zaroor ki hogi... main aapko achhi tarah se jaanta hoon... aapki kahin tikati nahin hai...achha pehle ye batao.. aap yahan chandigarh mein kya kar rahe ho.. aap to Mauritius main the.... har teesri post main to aap ye batate ho…

Chachu kuchh aage kehte tabhi ek banda cycle pe doodh ke drum leke aata hua dikhayi diya.. chachu ko dekh ke usne stand lagaya aur gusse se chachu ki taraf badha aur usne chachu ko kaha- oye tu abhi tak yahin hai.. thahar ja..teri to…

Chachu mere peechhe chhup gaya.. aur teete ne us bande ko peeche se pakad liya.. main daant peseta hua… us bande ki tarfa badha aur usko collar se pakad kar poochhne laga- sale tu hai hai jisne mere chache ki pitai shuru ki.. bata is shareef masoom insaan ne tera kya bigada hai

To wo banda bola- bau ji ye koi shareef insaan nahin hai… is bande main koi bhari gadbad hai… main subah doodh leke jar aha tha aur ye guachi gaan (lost cow) ki tarah sadak ke beecho beech ghoom raha tha… ye mere cycle ke aage aa gaya aur maine kaha - oye bhain c*** tere ko dikhayi nahin deta… abhi mera saara doodh gira dena tha…- to ye banda mujhe wapis gaali dene ki bajaye khush ho gaya aur mujhe gale lagane ke liye meri taraf badha… mujhe laga koi galat banda hai… maine is ko peetna shuru kar diya.. baki log bhi aa gaye.. aur aap jaante hi ho… mujhe kya pata ye aapka chacha hai.. mujhe maaf kardo…

Humne achhi tarah se us bande se maafi mangwai aur use chhod diya.... uske jaane ke baad maine chachu se poochha – chachu ye kya kiya... aapne use wapis gaali kyon nahin di

To chachu sharmate hue bole ... puttar jab usne mere ko bahan wali gaali di to main samjha ke koi meri tarah incest lover hai.. main to khushi ke maare pagal ho gaya aur usko gale lagane wala tha ke usne meri pitai shuru kar di.. ab batao ye koi baat bani..

Maine apna sir peet liya aur teete se kaha ke traali se chairs utar kar ped (tree) ke neeche rakh de.. main aur chachu wahan baith gaye... maine chachu se kaha ke ab batao aap yahan kya kar rahe ho

To chachu ne apni kahani sunani shuru ki…

chachu – puttar tu forher ko jaanta hai… usko rohan bhi kehte hain…

main – haanji.. jaanta hoon… achhi tarah se jaanta hoon..

chachu – (gusse main) – nahin.. tu use nahin jaanta… wo bahut kameena insaan hai… uski stories koi nahin padhta.. jabke meri stories sab padhte hain.. meri stories ke views bhi uski stories se ziada hote hain… wo isi karan mere se jalta hai.. aur wo meRE SE KEHTA HAI KE MAIN APNI STORIES KO AUTO FRESH PE LAGA KE RAKHTA HOON AUR ALIAS CREATE KARKE APNI STORIES MAIN KHUD HI REPLY DE DETA HOON… BATAO YE KOI BAAT BANI

main- chachu pehle to aap caps main bolna band karo.. ye na ho ke mere andar ka mod jag jaaye aur yahin main aapko infraction de doon..

chachu – wo to puttar main bhavnao main beh jaata hoon… writer hoon… sentimental bhi hoon… isliye khial nahin rehta… aur tu mujhe ye baar baar mod hone ki dhamki mat de… meri jaan pehchaan bade bade logon se hai… main kisi tuche mod se nahin darta.. seedhi tarah se meri baat sun nahin to main seedha apne contacts ko contact karoonga…
ek baar to main dar hi gya.. ke pata nahin kin kin bade logon ko jaanta hai… aur unse meri shikayat karke mujhe hi modship se na karwa de.. chup chap iski baat sun leta hoon… warna modship chali gayi to lulli khadi karni mushkil ho jaegi…

main – okay chachu bolo.. par plz small letters main hi bolna…

chachu - haan to main keh raha tha ke ye rohan bahut kameena hai… mere saare fans ko dhamkata rehta hai… iske 40-50 alias bhi hain.. un sab ko leke meri stories main galat comments karwata rehta hai.. ye apne aap ko samjhata kya hai.. ye koi writer waiter nahin hai.. aiwain internet se copy paste karta rehta hai..

main- chachu agar wo writer nahin hai to is baar wo story contest kaise jeet gaya…

chachu- wo to wo isliye jeet gaya ke main usmain participate nahin kar raha tha… aur jo story tinkerman ne likhi thi wo agar kisi judge ko samjh aa jati to tinkerman hi jeet ta.. is ke peechhe bhi rohan hai… usne sab judges ko daru pila ke talli kar diya hoga.. aura ab wo MC ki purple lungi pehan ke mere ko aur chidata rehta hai… ab to mere pe wo koi comment bhi nahin deta… tu nahin jaanta uski ye silence mujhe andar tak hila deti hai… maine socha ke enough is enough… main rohan ko seedha karne ke liye south Africa gya tha… wahan se pata chala ke wo aaj kal Punjab aaya hua hai.. bas uski ki talash main yahan aaya tha.. ab main use yahin se ban karwa doonga… mujhe pata chala hai wo bas pakad kar isi taraf gya hai… main uske peechhe peechhe bhaag raha tha ke ye wala kalesh pad gya.. ab tu mujhe bata ye sadak kahan tak jaati hai…

main – chachu... sadak to Pakistan tak jaati hai.. haan par ismain right left turn karne main koi pabandi nahin… ab pata nahin roohan bha ji ki bas kis taraf mudi hogi…

chachu – tu meri madad kar na puttar usko dhoondne main…

dopahar ho gayi thi… mujhe to bhook lag rahi thi.. teen dino main se aadha se ziada din beet gya tha… maine apne aap ko samjhaya ke chachu ka randi rona to chalta rahega.. in chakron main main ziada pada to lulli saali khadi hi nahin hogi… maine chachu ko taalne ke liye kaha…

main -chachu abhi to bhook bahut lagi hai.. kuchh khane ka jugaad karte hain phir koi plan banate hain… rohan bha ji ko dhoondne ka..

chachu – abe.. teri chachi ne chicken sandwich pack karke diye the raaste ke liye.. aur mere paas coke bhi.. yahi khaate peete hain…

main khush ho gya… maine socha pehle to budhau ke sandwich lapet te hain phir koi achha sa bahana bana ke ise taal denge… maine teete ko bhi bulaya khane ke liye… teeta bola

teeta – nahin yaar tum log khao.. tujhe to pata hai main muhn khol ke driving karta hoon.. ab 4-5 makhiyan ghus gayi thi moohn main.. mera to pet usi se bhar gya…

main aur chachu khana khane lage… jaise hi khana khatam hua chachu ka phone baj utha.. wo phone sun ne laga.. phone sunte sunte wo apne pet ko pakad ke daba raha tha… aur phone sun ne ke baad mujhse bola…

chachu – ek minute putter main zara tatti karke aaya… tere dost saeber tooth ka phone tha… mera bhi achha dost hai.. par pata nahin kyon jab bhi main is se baat karta hoon mujhe tatti ka pressure pad jaata hai…

chachu to jhadiyon ke peeche chala gya.. maine teete ko side main leja ke kaha..

main – yaar teete.. ye banda kham khah peeche pad gya hai.. iske chakron main rahe to lulli khadi hone koi chance nahin… is se kaise peechha chhudya jaaye…

teeta kafi der sochne ke baad bola – tu to pagal hai.. dekh lulli khadi karne ke liye humain idhar udhar daud bhaag karni padegi… us main kharcha hota hai.. le de ke 100 rupe honge tere paas.. hum aisa karte hain ise apne saath rakhte hain.. mauka milte hi ise bech denge.. kuchh to milega..

main – teete tera to dimag kharab hai… ise koun kharedga.. aiwain ise khialana pilana padega… uspe alag kharcha hoga..

teeta – abe jab log apple ka ipad, iphone khareed sakte hain… ise kyon nahin khareedenge… ise bas saath rakh.. bechne ki jimmewari meri…

mujhe kuchh samjh nahin aa raha tha… par maine teete ki baat maan li.. ab aur koi chara nahin tha.. itne main chachu bhi apna kaam karke wapis aa gya.. maine chachu ko kaha ke hum Chandigarh ja rahe hain… aap hamare saath chalo… wahin baith ke koi plan banayenge… wo bus to pata nahin ab kahan ki kahan ja chuki hogi… chachu bhi tyar ho gya aur hum sab tractor pe baith ke chandigarh ki taraf nikal liye…

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09-07-2012, 07:43 PM
Post: #5
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Evening

abhi humne chandigarh ka thoda hi raasta poora kiya tha ke chachu ko koi message aaya.. message padte hi usne apne dil pe haath rakha aur tractor se neeche gir pada.. jab hum tractor rok ke uske paas pahunche to unki maut ho chuki thi… hum dono gabhra gaye.. ke ye kya ho gaya.. teete ne wahin paas pada mobile uthaya aur message padne laga.. wahan pe likha tha .. “u r made mod of exbii.. u can gain mod powers by replying YES to this message”

maine teete se kaha… teete ye to tapak gaya…

teeta bola… yaar ye to khamkhah hi mar gaya.. lagta hai.. mod ban ne ki khushi bardashat nahin hui.. aur heart attack ho gaya..

maine kaha… abhi ye heart attack se mara hai ya tractor se girne se.. ye to autopsy se hi pata chalega.. par agar isko kahin le gaye to hamare gale pad jayega aur police waise hi hum jaison ki bajane ke liye tyaar baithi rehti hai.. kya karein..

teeta ne sochte hue kaha.. dekh aisa karte hain… humain kya lena dena ke ye kaise mara par ye hamare saath tha iska kisi ko nahin pata… isko yahin kahin daba dete hain aur apun log kalti marte hain yahan se… kisi ko kya pata chalega ke iska kya hua..

baat teeta theek keh raha tha.. punjab police se hum dono kafi baar pit chuke the aur unki maar to unki maar hi hoti hai bas… humne tractor side main laga ke.. sadak ke thoda hat ke ek gaddha khoda ur chachu ko us main daba diya.. phir hum dono bhare man se chabdigarh ki taraf nikal liye..

abhi hum 5 km hi gaye the ke teeta kehta use susu karna hai… maine tractor roka aur teeta utar ke karne laga.. mujhe bhi karna tha isliye main bhi utar gaya.. hum dono ne decide kiya ke jiski dhaar ziada door jaegi wo jeet jayega.. aur jo harega wo drive karega aur doosra peechhe baithega… abhi hamara compition shuru hi hua tha ke humain ek oink oink ki awaz sunai di.. humne dekha ke ek new born baby (pig) wahan ghoom raha hai… lagta tha jaise abhi abhi uska birth hua hai..

use dekh ke teete ne kaha… yaar meri bachpan main badi ichchha thi ke main koi pet rakhoon par mere ghar walon ne kabhi rakhne hi nahin diya.. aaj isko dekh ke mere bachpan wali ichchha phir se mere dil main uthne lagi hai.. abhi abhi paida hua hai..lagta hai iski maa isko chhod ke bhaag gayi… is bechare ko bhi ghar mil jaega.. aur main ise bolna bhi sikhaoonga..

maine teete se poochha.. yaar aise kaise kisi new born ko uski maa chhod ke bhaag gai.. ye to maha paap hai.. aisa to jaanwron main bhi nahin hota

teeta- ho sakta hai ye incest lover ho aur iski maa bachari shareef ho.. aisi aulad ko chhodna hi usne theek samjha ho.. aisi aulad se to beaulaad hi theek hai

main- baat to tu theek keh raha hai.. par aise jaanwar ko tu apne paas kyon rakhega..

teeta- wo main apne aap isko seedha kar doonga.. aur maine to iska naam bhi soch liya hai.. iska naam main cash rakhoonga

maine poochha- cash.. ye kya naam hua.. maine to kabhie nahin suna ke ek (pig) ka naam cash ho..

teete ne kaha.. yaar ek baat ka dukh mujhe hamesha raha hai.. jab bhi koi mujh se poochhta hai.. tere paas cash hai kya.. main hamesha apna mooh latka leta hoon… kabhi hota hi nahin.. ab kam se kam ye to keh sakta hoon ke mere paas cash hai.. waise na sahi.. aise hi sahi.. par cash to hoga..

mujhe teete ki baat bahut achhi lagi.. usne cash ko godi main liya aur peechhe baith gaya… main tractor ko start kiya aur hum log phir se chandigarh ki taraf chal diye
main tractor chalane laga… teeta peechhe baitha baitha cash se pata nahin apne dil ke koun se raaz share kar raha tha.. tractor chalate hue main soch main dooba hua tha… do din se thoda upar ka time reh gaya tha aur lulli kahdi karne ka koi bhi jugaad nahin ban raha tha… main inhi sochon main dooba hua tha ke achaanak mujhe ek ajeeb sa ehsaas hua jaise meri side main aake koi baith gaya ho… mere ko laga teeta hoga … par jab dekha to kuchh bhi na dikhayi diya.. maine peechhe mud ke dekha teeta waise ka waise cash se baatein kar raha tha..

maine socha ye aise hi mere man ka waham hoga aur main tractor chalata raha… par phir mujhe ehsaas hua ke koi mujhe mere kandhe se pakad ke hila raha hai.. main gabhra gaya… nazar to koi aa nahin raha tha par ye ho kya raha tha… maine tractor rock diya aur aas paas dekhne laga…

teete ne poochha- kya hua phir mootne jaana hai kya..

maine kaha – yaar teete mujhe laga kisi ne mere kandhe se pakad ke mujhe hilaya hai.. kahin tu nahin tha..

teete bola- main to abhi cash ko apni saari kahani suna raha tha maine kya karna tha tujhe hilake..

tabhi ek awaz aayi- ye main hoon putter

awaz casinar chachu jaisi thi… par ye kasie ho sakta tha.. wo to mar chuke the aur abhi to hum unhe daba ke aaye the..

main gusse main bola.. koun saala hum se mazaak kar raha hai..

phir awaaz aayi- nahin putter ye main hi hoon tera casinar chachu… main bhoot ban gaya hoon..

teeta dar se kaampne laga.. use bhooton se bahot dar lagta tha.. maine kabhie bhoot dekhe nahin the… meri daadi hamesha kehti rehti thi ke bhoot hote nahin hain.. ab jo cheez hoti nahin us se kya darna… par mujhe bahut ajeeb sa lag raha tha..aur ye bhi suna tha ke bhoot raat ko hi nikalte hain.. par ho sakta tha ke chachu ke maamle main thodi exception de di gayi ho…

phir maine himmat karke poochha – ye kya ho gaya chachu… aap bhoot kaise ban gaye

chachu ki awaaz aayi – kya bataoon putter.. jab main marke upar pahunch aur upar walon ne apna register check kiya to wahan mere naam ki entry nahin thi.. unhone muhje bahut gaaliyan nikali aur kaha ke abhi mera time poora nahin hua mujhe wapis neeche jaana chahiye… ye bhi kaha ke main apni is bina bulaye kahin bhi ghus jaane wali adat kab chhodunga...ab main kya karoon putter jahan main jaata hoon wahin se meri butty pe laat maarke nikal dete hain.. lagta hai ke mujhe koi pasand nahin karta… phir neeche aake dekha to tum log meri body ko gaad chuke ho.. itni bhi kya jaldi thi tum logon ko… ab jaldi chalo.. meri body ko wahan se nikalo taki main dobara zinda ho sakoon.. aur apne kaam kar sakoon

maine kaha- aise hai chachu ke jin bandon ka tractor liya hai unse kaha tha ke chaar baje tak hi chahiye… ab chaar bajne wale hain aur wo log shor macha rahe honge.. aisa karte hain abhi aap hamare saath aise hi chalo.. tractor wapis karke yahan wapis aane ka koi jugaad laga lenge aur aapki body ko wapis nikal lenge.. abhi aap peechhe jaaker teete ke saath baitha jao… aur teete tujhe chachu ke bhoot se darne ki koi zaroorat nahin.. ye jab zinda the tab nahi inse koi darta tha… ab bhoot banker kya kisi ko dara lenge..

pata nahin teete ko baat samjh main aayi ke nahin par usne sar hila diya… aur ajeeb si nazaron se apne saath padi hui khali kursi ko dekhne laga..

chachu ki awaaz aayi- aise kya dekh rahe ho.. kabhie kisi bhoot ko nahin dekha kya…

teeta bola- nahin.. seriously nahin dekha aura ab jab dekha… mera matlab nahin dekha… to dekha ke nahin dekh sakte.. par chachu ek baat batao… bhooton ke lulli hoti hai kya

mujhe gussa aa gya.. maine teete se kaha – abe yujhe kya lena dena hai bhooton ki lulli se.. yahan zinda aadmi ki lulli nahin khadi ho rahi tujhe bhooton ki lulli ki padi hai..

teete ne kaha- are yaar main to aise hi general knowledge ke liye pooch raha tha… abhi mujhe ek scooter workshop main job offer hui hai… us shop ke malik ne mere se kaha tha ke interview lega.. ab pata nahin interview main kya pooch le is liye pooch liya…

chachu ki awaz aayi – pata nahin… abhi jaise tum muhje nahin dekh pa rahe ho.. waise hi main bhi apne aap ko nahin dekh pa raha is liye keh nahin sakta ke bhooton ke lulli hoti hai ke nahin.. haan meri body main ek chhoti si lagi hui thi… main jab zinda tha doctor ko dikhane bhi gaya tha... par usne bahan ji keh ke.. anti pimple crteam deke bahga diya tha...

ab ye nai musibat aa gayi thi… lulli khadi karne ghar se nikla tha aur pata nahin kin chakron main phasta ja raha tha… bhare man se maine tractor dobara start kiya.. aur hum charon.. main, teeta, cash aur chachu ka bhoot chandigarh ki taraf nikal liye…

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09-07-2012, 07:44 PM
Post: #6
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Ek aur prologue

Budhwaar ka din tha.. pata nahin saala kaisa manhoos din tha.. koi baat seedhi nahin ho rahi thi.. pehle to meri police station main pitai hui… hua ye ke hamare pados main do Bengali families rehti hain.. wo apas main bahut ladte the.. par had is baat ki thi ke wo dono bangali main ladte the.. mujhe is baat pe gussa tha ke unki baat samjh nahin aati thi… us din subah subah phir se ladai ho rahi thi.. main bada tang aa chukka tha… main ek ke ghar gya aur us se kaha ke bhai agar ladna hai to hindi Punjabi main lad lo… kuchh hamara bhi bhala ho jaaye… Bengali to mujhe samjh nahin aati… pata nahin wo babu moshaiye kya samjha…(main Punjabi main bol raha tha).. usne police ko phone kar diya.. aur Punjab police to mere jaison ko dhoondti rehti hai.. wo mujhe pakad ke le gaye.. thane main kya hua.. ye to nahin bata sakta.. mod ki izzat ka sawal hai… par meri dhulai kaafi hui thi.. maine ye bhi poocha ke.. yaar bata to do kyon peet rahe ho.. wo kehne lage.. ke humain har baar thodi pata hota hai ke kyon peet rahe hain.. maine kaha bhai.. paise le lo.. par peeto mat.. unhone meri talashi li.. poore 35 rupiye nikle meri jeb se.. is pe unko aur gussa aa gya.. bas phir poocho mat kya hua.. par thori baad pata chala ke DSP ka kutta gum ho gya.. aur sab log udhar lag gaye.. mere ko chhor diya.. maine bahut duaien di us kutte ko..

Khair yahan se nikla.. seedha cyber café main ghus gya.. kai dino pehle mujhe ek mail aayi thi jisme maine $ 50 million jeete the.. kisi bhagwaan swroop bande ne mujhe mail karke mere internet banking ka login aur password poocha tha.. take wo $ 50 million mere account main jama karwa sake… maine bhej diya tha usko… achha banda tha Nigeria ka.. uska to koi jawab nahin aaya tha.. maine socha bank main hi check kar loon… shayad wahan jama karwa diye hon..main to shocked ho gya… mera account balance jo kuchh din pehle poore 325 rupiye tha.. bilkul zero ho gya tha… mujhe bada shock laga.. maine bank wali madam ko phone kiya.. to wo boli ye to kisi Nigerian account main transfer ho gye hain… main samjh gya.. ke mujhse thagi hui hai..

Mera mood off ho gya.. aur jab bhi mera mood off hota hgai main jogging karne chala jaata hoon.. us din bhi chala gya apne college ke ground main… dhyaan mera kahin aur tha.. aur kar main jogging raha tha.. ek dum thokar khake gira… kuchh der to mere ko samjh nahin aaya.. ke ek dum se vertical se horizontal kaise ho gya.. par tabhi ek dum se mere lower abdominal region main badi pain shuru ho gayi.. mane dekha ke.. wahan se blood nikal raha hai… waise to main sher se bhi nahin darta… par blood dekh ke mujhe kuchh ho jaata hai.. main behosh ho gya… kuchh der baad meri aankh khooli to dekha ke main dr. gamdoor singh ke clinic main hoon.. mujhe wahan pe jo doosre bande khel rahe the.. kuchh mere dost bhi the un main.. wo utha ke laaye the.. dr. saab bahut knowledge wale bande the… readymade kapdon ki dukaan bhi chalate the aur har bimari ka tassali bucksh ilaaz bhi karte the.. bade bade news papers main unki chhoti chhoti ad bhi aati thi ke.. shadi se pehle ya shaadi ke baad job hi bimari ho wo theek kar dete hain… main khush ho gya.. ke chalo.. I m in good hands… par dr. Saab to bahut gambheer mudra banaye baithe the.. maine poocha dr. saab sab theek to hai?

Wo bole.. kaka tere to tatte phoot gaye…

Main ghabra gya.. maine kaha dr. saab aap hi maalik ho.. aap kuchh karo.. maine to abhi tak ladki ko touch karke bhi nahin dekha.. main to barbaad ho jaaoonga…

Wo bole.. dekh kaka injection to main laga deta hoon… par is injection ko lagne ke teen din ke andar andar agar teri lulli khadi nahin hui.. to saari umar khadi nahin hogi…

Maine injection lagwa liya.. aur ghar wapis aa gya

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09-07-2012, 07:44 PM
Post: #7
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Morning

raat ko main jaldi aake so gya tha.. dr saab ke injection main hi kuchh tha... shayd afeem ka injection de diya tha... par subah 9 baje meri aankh khul hi gayi.. jab mujhe achhi tarah se hosh aaya to pichhle din baatien yaad aayi.. mere toh hosh ud gaye.. maine socha ..bhai tere paas sirf 3 din hai lulli khadi karne ke liye.. warna tu to gya... par ab lulli khadi kaise ho...ye question tha.. maine socha dr saab ko phone kiya jaaye.... wohi koi idea de sakte hain... par jab maine phone kiya to udhar se kisi ladki ki awaaz aayi

"the service to the dialed number has temporarily been withdrawn because of non payment of dues"

maine socha dr saab kisi ladki se angrezi main baat kar rahe hain.. bade logon ki badi batein.. mujhe to kuchh palle nahin pada... kafi baar number dial kiya par shayad wo kafi der baatein kar rahe the..

haar kar maine khud ka dimaag lagana shuru kiya.. to idea aaya ke lulli to kisi sexy c ladki ko dekhke hi khadi ho sakti hai... ab sexy c ladki kahan se laaon... phir exbii ka khial aaya.. pnv main badi badi sexy kudian hain

par yahan bhi chain thora hai.. ye naye naye se jo mod bane hain ye saara din doosron ki jasoosi karte rehte hain... aur to kuchh kaam nahin inko.. phir ye eagle eyes wale thread main ek min lagate hain post karne main .. maine yahan pe sab ko keh rakha hai ke main shareef hun pnv main nahin jaata... agar inko pata chal gya ke main pnv main baitha hoon to inhone to mera jeena mushkil kar dena hai.. moderation ke liye gya tha ye bahana bhi nahin chalna.. kyonki moderate to main LLPAT ko bhi kar sakta hoon... aur namita ke boobs wale thread ko kyon moderate karta hai koi .. aur 90% pics to saber aur ulti ne fake banai hui hain .. inka kya faida

phir mere dimaag main ek aur idea aaya.. maine ladki patane ki sochi bas phir kya tha.. main nahaya.. kapde pehne.. baal wagera kanghi karki apna scooter uthaiya aur chal pada ladki patane...

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09-07-2012, 07:44 PM
Post: #8
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Morning
continues

Haan to main keh raha tha ke maine apna scooter uthya.. bajaj chetak hai.. 96 model.. aur start karne se pehle usko tedha kiya..30-40 kick maari aur bas nikal pada.. aaj to maine socha ya main nahin ya ladki nahin… aaj to patani hi thi… aakhir lulli jo khadi karni thi…

Jaise ek bhai keh raha tha ke Punjab main ladkiyon ka akal hai.. oye bau.. koi akal wakal nahin hai punjab main ladkiyon ka… tum kya jaano punjaban kya hoti hai.. khair gali ke mod par hi ek ladki rickshaw main jaa rahi.. lambe lambe baal.. aur laal colur ki t shirt… blue jeans… meri to lottery nikal gayi.. maine socha aaj to ghar se nikalte hi kaam ban gya.

Maine scooter rickshaw ke peechhe laga liya… scooter mera bada zabardast hai.. bas 3rd -4th gear main thodi problem hai.. dalte nahin hain.. 2nd main hi chalana padta hai.. aur agar full speed pe karo to rickshaw ke barabar speed ho jaati hai…

To phir rickshaw aage aage ..main uske peechhe..thori der rickshaw wala ruk gya aur rickshaw se utar gya.. wo peechhe ko aane laga.. pehle to maine socha ke mujhe peetne aa raha hai.. main jo uski sawari ko patane laga tha.. par uski chain utar gayi thi use chadane aaya tha.. maine socha ab sahi mouka hai ladki se baat karta hoon.. main dheere dheere scooter ko aage ki aur leke aaya.. aur thodi c hi peechhe ruk gya.. ladki phone pe kisi se baat kar rahi thi… wah kya gore gore haath the… mujhe halka sa current mehsoos hua lulli main.. tabhi usne phone band kar diya… aur apna haath neeche ki ore le aayi… main jaan bhooj ke doosri taraf dekhne lag gya.. taki usko shak na ho.. phir.. halke se garden ghuma ke ladki ki aur dekha… uska poora face to dikhayi nahin de raha tha.. par jitna bhi dikh raha thaw wo ekdum black colur ka tha.. maine hairaan reh gya.. ye kaise possible hai.. hath gore gore.. aur moohn ek dum kaala..

Kuchh din pehle hi maine aahat ka ek episode dekha tha.. wahan pe bhi ek aisi ladki thi.. par wo bhoot thi.. maine socha kahin ye bhi bhoot to nahin.. ek baar to mere ko dar laga.. par phir maine socha .. mujhe to lulli khadi karne se matlab hai.. bhoot ho ladki ho… kya farak padta hai

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09-07-2012, 07:45 PM
Post: #9
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Morning
continues

Phir mere ko ek aur khial aaya.. ab tak jitni bhi bhoot wali serials ya movies dekhi thi un main jo bhoot hote hain wo raat ko kabarstaon ke aas paas dikhayi dete hain.. ye koun se naye style ka bhoot hai jo savere 10 baje rickshaw main ghoom raha hai… maine aur dhyaan se dekha.. to uski naak dikyai di.. naak to gori thi.. tab mere ko pata chala ke jise main kala rang samjh raha tha wo kala rang nahin us ladki ki darhi thi… main hairaan ho gya.. darhi wali ladki to maine kabhie dekhi nahin thi

Main kaafi confuse ho gya.. in halaat main mujhe ek hi bande ki yaad aati hai.. aur wo hai mera dost “teeta”

Is se pehle ke main story ko aage badhayoon.. main aapko teete ke bare main batana chahta hoon..taki aap achhi tarah se usko samjh sako aur kahani properly enjoy kar sako…

Teeta mera pakka dost hai… baaki sab theek hai par usko baat zara kam samjh main aati hai.. baat to actually mere ko bhi kam samjh main aati hai… (aap to apne ho is liye bata raha hoon .. par aap aage kisi se na kehna ) isliye hamari ziada banti hai.. wo apne dada ji bachittar singh ke saath yahan gurudware main rehta hai.. uske daade ko afeem khane ki aadat hai.. kabhi kabhie teeta bhi uski dibbi main se nikal kar kha leta hai … jab gurudware walon ko pata chalta hai ke ye log afeem khate hain.. to unko karke nikal dete hain… wo kisi aur gurudware main chale jaate hain… khana langar main hi khaate hain

Teeta +2 main 3 baar fail ho chuka hai.. uske baad ab wo mobile repair karne ka course kar raha hai… mera nokia 1100 usi ne 350 rupiye main second hand leke diya tha.. torch ke saath.. kehta raat ko bhi chalta hai..

Teeta bhola bhala masoom sa banda hai.. zindgi main kai gam hain usko .. uska sabse bada gam hai ke uske pind (gaon, village ) main bus nahin rukti.. ya 3 km pehle utar dete hain ya 3 km baad main… jawani main ek baar uska dada is baat pe protest karne chandigarh gya tha.. par police ne usko raaste main hi dhar liya tha aur khoob peeta.. itna ke abhi bhi usko kai baar sardiyon main dard hota hai..

Teete ka asli naam teerath singh hai.. par uske ghar walon ko itna complicated naam lena nahin aata .. isliye sab use teeta hi kehte hain… apna asli naam wo khud bhi bhool chuka hai.. +2 main 2 baar fail hone ka kaaran yahi tha.. teacher jab bhi attendance ke liye teerath singh ka naam bulate the to use pata nahin chalta tha ke uska naam bulaya hai.. wo absent mark ho jaata tha ... uske lecture poore nahin hote the aur usko roll number nahin milta tha.. jab teesre saal school waalon ko apni galti pata chali aur usko roll number diya.. to wo apni mehnat se fail hua tha…

Uska naam teeta kaise pada.. iski bhi ek kahani hai.. actually teeta distt bathinda ke pind kot fatta se belong karta hai.. unki saari family uske daade ke daade ke zamane se ek hi ghar main rehte hain… bahut saare log hain.. koi 150 bachche hamesha ghoomte rehte hain.. unhone bahut saare kutte bhi paal rakhe hain.. kutton ke naam bhi rakh rakhe hain.. ab itne saare bachche aur itne saare kutton ke naam rakhne main saare naam khatam ho jaate hain… kai baar koi naam kisi bachche ka bhi hota tha aur kutte ka bhi.. is liye jab kutte ko bulate the to bachcha bhaag ke aa jaata tha aur jab bachche ko bulate the, kutta aa jata tha.. is baat ka solution ghar ke bade budhon ne ye nikala ke jab tak koi kutta na mare.. tab tak kisi naye paida hue bachche ka naam na rakha jaaye.. aur jab koi kutta mare uska naam us bachche ko de diya jaaye…is tarah teerath singh ke janam ke 7 saal baad uska naam teeta rakha gya kyonki tab teeta naam ka kutta mara tha…

Khair apni story pe wapis aate hai.. teete ke bare main koi aur jaankari chahiye to mujhe pm kar dena..

Haan to maine teete ko phone kiya…aur usne phone uthaya..

hamara wartalaap kuchh is tarah se hua..

teeta- hallo..koun bolta hai

main- oye teete main bol raha hoon..

teeta- yaar kamal hai.. idhar se bhi main hi bol raha hoon

usko 15 minute samjhane main lag gay eke main koun hoon.. wo to bhala ho us rickshaw wale ka ke wo bidi peene baith gya tha..

main- yaar teete, tone kabhi darhi wali larki dekhi hai?

Teeta- maine to nahin dekhi.. par shayad hoti hon.. maine saari ladkiyan thodi dekhi hain…

Main- kya matlab

Teeta – dekh, duniya main 6 billion log hain… in main se underage log jinki baat hum exbii ki story main nahin kar sakte… aur overage log jinki baat karne ka koi faida nahin hai… nikaal de to bhi kareeb 4 billion log bachte hain.. in main se 2 billion ke kareeb ladkiyan hogi… ziada se ziada 10000 ladkiyan maine real main dekhi hongi aur 100 000 ke kareeb photos, movies tv wagera main.. phir bhi baaki kaafi bach gayi.. ho sakta hai darhi wali ladkiyan in baaki bachi ladkiyon main hon..

Baat to teeta bhi theek keh raha tha.. main soch main pad gya.. itne main rickshaw wale ki beedi khatam hui aur wo dobara rickshaw chalane laga… main phir uske peechhe..

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09-07-2012, 07:45 PM
Post: #10
RE: Lulli Khadi ho Gayi
Day 1 - Thursday

Morning

continues...

thori der baad market ke saahmne rickshaw ruk gya aur ladki utar gay.. ab main peechhe nahin hatne wala tha maine koi na koi faisla karne ka irada kar liya tha.. ladki utri aur seedhi meri taraf badhne lagi.. mujhe wo kuchh jaani pehchani c lagi.. jab aur paas aayi to mujhe wo mere dost pamme jaise lagi.. (pamme ka asli naam parminder singh hai.. wo exbii se kai baar ban ho chuka hai).. par maine socha pamma to 2-3 saal pehle zameen bech ke kisi foreign country main gya tha… shyad wahin jaake ladki ban gya ho… main hairaan ho gya.. maine kaha.. oye pamme tu ladki kab se bana...

Pamma meri baat sun ke gabhra gya.. jaldi se bhaag ke market ki toilet main chala gya.. main wahin khada raha.. koi aadhe ghante baad pamma wapis aaya.. bada khush.. kehta nahin yaar.. main ladka hi hoon.. main abhi properly check karke aaya hoon… tab bat meri samjh poori tarah se aa gayi.. paama jaroor aaj keshi nahya hoga aur baal khule chhor rakhe honge .. us baat se mere ko dhokha ho gya… Punjabi bhai to meri baat samjh gaye honge par doosron ke liye main samjha deta hoon.. kesh ,baal (hair) ko kehte hain aur sardar log daily sar pe paani nahin daalte.. hafte main ek do baar hi achhi tarah se nahate hain.. isko keshi nahana bolte hain..

Khair maine pamme se uska haal poochha aur kaha ke yaar tu to kisi foreign country main gya tha.. kya hua

Sun kar pamma rone laga aur kehne laga ke ..yaar mere saath to badi buri hui.. mere ko tere teete ne ek kabootar baaz ke paas phasa diya ..

(Punjab main “bahar” jaane ka bada riwaaz hai.. “bahar” kisi bhi foreign country ko keh dete hain… chahe bangladesh ho chahe USA.. ab kai log to padh likh ke bahr jaake settle ho gaye hain.. bade bade boards ke admin bhi ban gaye hain… kudiyan bhi phasa rakhi hain.. inki dekha dekhi pamme jaise bande bhi apni poonchh khadi kar lete hain (tyaar ho jaate hain) aur.. kisi na kisi agent ke chakkar main pad jaate hain.. agent inse paise leke inko “bahar” bhej dete hain… paise ye log aksar apni khet bari wali zameen (agricultural land) bech arrange karte hain… is “bahar” bhejne wale process ko kabootar baazi aur agent ko kabootar baaz kehte hain.. kabootar (pigeon) aap khud hi samjh lo koun hua)..

Pamme ne aage kaha … yaar wo kabootar baaz ne promise kiya tha ke mere ko Mauritius bhejega.. paise bhi le liye par Mumbai main se ship pe chada ke ..ek lamba sa chakkar lagwa ke.. kerala main utar diya.. 6 mahine mahine to mujhe pata hi nahin chala ke main Mauritius main hoon ya kerala main.. jab pata chala to yahan wapis aane ke paise nahin the.. kahan to socha tha Mauritius main casi chache ki kahaniyan sunenge .. incest wali.. kahan kerala main saara din alamzada saab apne law lecture de de ke bund maar lete the.. aur raat ko illegal aake apna sumo wala danda usi bund main ghusa deta tha.. bade dukh waale din kaate hain maine veer… wo to kabhie kabhie shapusundri ka mujra dekhne ko mil jaata tha.. warna main to wahin mar jaata.. jaise hi paise ikkathe hue main wapis aagya..

Mujhe teete pe bhi bada gussa aaya.. man hi man usko khoob gaaliyan de daali.. wo gaaliyan yahan nahin likh sakta.. against the rules hai.. main khud hi apne aap ko ban kar doonga.. kal hi ek :chutiya: 3 baar ban kiya tha.. gaaliyon ke chakkar main..


Illegal to mera boss tha… election ke dino se.. uska to main kuchh kar nahin sakta tha.. haan par alam sir ko dekhne ki maine thaan li.. mere hi section main the… par in sab ke beech shapu ke liye mere dil main izzat aur bhi badh gayi..

Pamme se vida leke ..apni kismet pe rota hua.. maine wapis scooter start kiya aur ghar ki aur chal pada.. raaste main phir ek cyber cafe aaya.. to maine socha… yaar exbii pe hi chalke lulli khadi karne ka intzaam kiya jaaye..warna aaj darhi wali ladki dikhi thi..kal ko seeng wali dikh jayegi.. apna time aise hi nikal jayega.. good old exbii hi theek hai.. aur baaki rahi jo mere pe jasoosi karte hain unki baat.. unke pnv threads ki main waat laga doonga.. apne plan pe main man hi man muskurata hua cyber café ki taraf chal pada…

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